APOSTLES
St. Peter
“I do so love St. Peter,” says a friend of mine. “Whenever he opens his mouth, he puts his foot in it.”
She is right, of course. Whatever else St. Peter may be, he is not the model of a wise and noble hero. Yes, he walks on water – but then panics and starts to sink. Yes, he makes the first profession of faith – and moments later blunders into error and is called Satan by the Lord. Yes, he refuses to have his feet washed, and moments later, when the purpose is explained to him, demands to be washed all over. And, of course, he betrays his master soon after having been warned that he would and having sworn not to. If Peter is the rock on which the Church is built, what a fissured and friable rock it is! How much better, we might think, to have chosen the Sons of Thunder, for their energy; or Judas Iscariot, for his financial acumen; or John, because he was the one that Christ loved the best.
The choosing of Peter, however, teaches us a lesson. The Church’s foundation-stone and its first leader is not all-wise, all-knowing, good, heroic, and beautiful. He is a very ordinary man who makes about as many mistakes as we would in his place; and kicks himself for them just as thoroughly afterwards as we would. If St. Peter had been a hero, we could easily have despaired of ever becoming like him. If St. Peter had been great, and noble, and good, we could have told ourselves that the Church is for the saints; we might despair, sit down, and not bother. But the Church is not just for saints: it is for confused, impetuous, cowardly people like us – or like St. Peter. The rock crumbles, the ropes are frayed, the wood is rotten – but, although that improbable building, the Church, is made of such inferior materials, it grows (on the whole) faster than it collapses, and it is grace that holds it together.
In the end, it was grace that gave the coward the courage to bear witness when it counted; grace that gave the fool the wisdom he needed to set the infant Church on her way; grace that taught the impetuous man patience and forbearance.
None of us really admire ourselves, however much we might like to; let us not try to admire St. Peter either. Let us admire, instead, the grace he was given; and pray that, weak as we are, we may be given it too, and that we may use it.
St. Paul
Face it! St. Paul is not an attractive figure today. We are still knee deep in the overripe fruit of late romanticism. We admire men who feel, not ones who think, who enchant people into following them, not argue them into submission.
There is even, nowadays, a fashion for saying that Paul invented Christianity as we know it, that he set out with the cynical aim of fashioning an enduring institution; and that the real Christianity, the Christianity of Christ, is something quite different from, and far nicer than, the Christianity that we know.
Yes, Paul’s mind did shape the early Church. Yes, without him things would have been different. And all the information that we have in the New Testament is entirely consistent with the whole thing being a Pauline conspiracy.
But so what? “Consistent with” is a treacherous phrase. The evidence of my eyes is entirely consistent with there being an invisible lion in my fireplace. After all, you can’t see invisible lions; but I still don’t believe there is an invisible lion lurking there. I trust God, I have faith in God, and invisible lions are not part of that faith. I trust God, I have faith in the Holy Spirit. I try to say so out loud, not just on Sundays, but every day. And I believe that God called Saul because He needed him, and that the renamed Saul did and said what needed to be said and needed to be done.
Paul is not some cold and remote intellectual – just read the Epistles. See if that stands up. Paul is always reminding people of his weakness – look, I know what I ought to do, and I keep on doing the opposite – look, I have this thorn in my flesh and God absolutely refuses to take it away. Paul is not all mind – he does have his troubles too.
But yes, Paul does have a mind, and that raises problems in an age that does not respect intellect; that uses “clever” as a term of derision. Remember, though, that we are commanded to love the Lord our God with all our heart, with all our soul, with all our mind, and with all our strength. Perhaps we cannot love St. Paul very much nowadays; but let us at least pray for the grace to love God with our minds, too, just as he did.
May God Bless You and Grant You His Peace!