In today’s First Reading (1 Corinthians 12:31—13:13), we have likely one of the most quoted passages from Paul. We have seen Paul speaking to the Corinthian Christians about the various gifts of the Spirit with which different people are endowed so that they can better serve the needs of the community. He had been criticizing them for laying too much emphasis on and even desiring to have what they considered the more prestigious gifts. Using the analogy of the human body he had said that the overall unity of the community was more important than any one gift, just as the unity of the body depended on it having a full complement of limbs and organs for it to function properly.
Today, he goes further and says that, above and beyond any gifts or ‘charisms’, there is “a still more excellent way” for them to behave. That way is the over-riding element of love. Love is not on the same level as the other gifts. Rather, it is one of the most evident signs of the presence of the Spirit of Christ in the community and its members.
The word ‘love’ has many meanings. C.S. Lewis wrote a book called The Four Loves, each one of which can be found in the Scriptures: familial (storge); friendship (philia); romantic (eros); and spiritual (agape). Let us just briefly focus on three of these: eros, philia and agape.
Eros describes physical, sensual love, the love of lovers sharing physical intimacies with each other. At its best, it is a genuine and very beautiful form of love which involves the total giving of two people to each other through their bodies. Paul is not talking about this.
Philia is the love of friendship, where friendship implies mutuality and sharing between two people in a mutual self-giving to each other. It is the love of lovers at its best, the love of the happily married couple, and of friends who are deeply committed to each other. Sex may or may not be part of it. It implies an enduring relationship that may not be present in an eros relationship. Again, Paul is not talking about this type of love in today’s reading.
Agape is reaching out to another person with a deep desire for that person’s total well-being and wholeness. It is the love of compassion and caring. It differs from philia in that it does not expect a return (though that may be given); it is a totally unconditional form of loving. It is the love that God extends to all creatures whether they return that love or not.
In the First Letter of John, we are told that God is (agape) love (1 John 4:8). It is a constituent of his very being. Agape is a form of love which desires the good of the other quite independently of that person’s ‘lovable-ness’. It is the love that God extends equally to every person, irrespective of who they are or how they respond. It is a love that can be extended even to enemies, criminals and those who want to destroy us. It is the love that Jesus showed for those who nailed him to the cross. It is the love that Paul is speaking about here. It is a love which desires the good of the other, and hence is then especially offered to those who lack it most.
Paul speaks of the supremacy of agape over everything else we do or achieve. If our actions are not motivated by an agape love, then they are of no real value as far as our Christian life is concerned. Paul lists some of the qualities of this kind of agape-love:
- It is patient and kind. (These virtues were apparently not very conspicuous in the Corinthian community.)
- It is never jealous. (Jealousy seems to be present in those Corinthians who were more ambitious for certain charisms than satisfied with what they had.)
- It is never boastful or conceited. (Paul accuses the Corinthians of a certain arrogance which their overall moral behavior in no way justifies.)
- It is never rude or selfish. (Paul mentions the divisive factions; the selfish behavior of some when celebrating the Lord’s Supper.)
- It does not take offence and is not resentful. (True agape is totally focused on the needs of the other and is not upset by hostility or rejection. Such inner resentment is a sign of insecurity. People who love with true agape-love cannot be offended because they are people who totally accept themselves as they are.)
- It takes no pleasure in other’s sins but delights in the truth. (The reaction to the weaknesses of others is neither delight nor judgement, but rather compassion. True love also is never afraid of the truth, but always wants to see it come to the surface. At the same time, the truly loving person will always speak the truth in love, being sensitive to the weaknesses of those for whom the truth can be very painful. One can speak the truth in a very unloving way.)
- It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. (True love always wants to find good in everyone. It is biased towards believing that people act in good faith. Despite outward circumstances, it never loses the certain hope that the truth and the good must ultimately prevail. It is ready in the worst of times to hang in there and to believe in the ultimate goodness of people.)
- Love outlasts everything else because love is part of God’s very nature; God is love. Loving is not just something God practices—it is a part of his very essence.
Many of the church’s most highly prized gifts will eventually pass away. Paul mentions prophecy—there will come a time when it is no longer needed. The gift of speaking languages will not be part of the life to come. Knowledge, however wide, will eventually be shown to be inadequate when we come face to face with the Infinite Source of all knowledge and wisdom.
Paul says that in the present moment, we are like children, talking like children, acting and arguing like children. We are like a man looking at his reflection in one of those polished metal mirrors of those days. The image can be seen but is somewhat blurred. But when the Lord comes, we will have the extraordinary experience of seeing God clearly, face to face. We will fully know the Lord the way that God knows us.
Paul sums up by saying that in the end only three things will perdure: faith, hope and agape-love. We will not need faith when we face our Creator. We will not need hope because every possible desire of our being will be fulfilled forever. But agape will remain. Face to face with God, we will be eternally bathed in that agape which pours from him and fills us with the happiness for which we were created.
Today’s Gospel passage (Luke 7:31-35) follows immediately after the scene (not in our Mass readings) where Jesus answers the query from John the Baptist, now languishing in prison, about whether Jesus is truly the Messiah. Jesus uses the occasion to speak words of high praise for John: “I tell you, among those born of women no one is greater than John; yet the least in the kingdom of God is greater than he” (Luke 7:28).
Jesus now criticizes the cynicism and self-contradictory attitudes of those who reject both him and John. They have simply closed their ears and want to hear nothing and learn nothing. He compares them to children in a city square calling to their playmates: “We played the flute for you, and you did not dance; we wailed, and you did not weep.”
This comparison Jesus applies to John the Baptist and himself. John led an austere life in the desert eating, as we are told elsewhere, only locusts and wild honey. Because of how he lived, some people called him mad and rejected him. Jesus came leading a highly convivial life, mixing with all kinds of people. They called him a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and other sinful people. He even invited a tax collector to be one of his twelve Apostles!
It was a no-win situation. With such people there is nothing that can be done.
It is important for us not to fall into such a trap. God speaks to us in so many ways and through so many people and situations. It is very easy to exclude the people or situations that God uses in trying to reach us. We cannot expect God to speak to us only in ways which we find congenial. He may speak to us through a saint or a sinner, through a conservative or a liberal, through a straight or gay person, or through a man or a woman or a young child. Perhaps he speaks through an old person or a young person, or through an educated or an illiterate person, or through someone we know or someone we don’t. We must always be ready to listen with an unprejudiced mind and heart.
May God Bless You and Grant You His Peace!